View Full Version : No stupid question, only stupid answers

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December 30th, 2007, 11:25 PM
Here's how this game works.....
This thread will be only questions and answers. For example:

Q) Why does everyone love Christmas?

A) Because everyone loves getting gifts

Q) Why do dogs chase their tails?

The first question is.....

Why do deer crossing signs only have pictures?

December 30th, 2007, 11:31 PM
A) Because Deer can't read.

Q) Why is snow white?

December 30th, 2007, 11:36 PM
A) Snow with any other color would still be snow

Q) Why do dogs bark?

Tim Roberts
December 30th, 2007, 11:48 PM
A) Because they can.

Q) When will it all end?

December 30th, 2007, 11:53 PM
A) when the curtain drops

Q) If a tough person gets going, what does a weak person do?

December 30th, 2007, 11:56 PM
A) A weak person becomes "Management"

Q) Why isn't the entire plane made out of the same stuff that the "black box" is made of?

December 31st, 2007, 12:00 AM
A) People would never want to procrate

Q) Why do people dress their daughters in pink and their sons in blue?

Tim Roberts
December 31st, 2007, 12:08 AM
A) Because they feel the need to conform.

Q) Why do birds fly?

December 31st, 2007, 12:10 AM
A) they can't run fast enough

Q) Which do you prefer watching movies or shooting your bow?

Tim Roberts
December 31st, 2007, 12:15 AM
A) Shooting my bow unless it's too hot.

Q) How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

December 31st, 2007, 01:09 AM
A) About 2 and a half cords a day.

Q) Does a skunk know that it smells bad?

December 31st, 2007, 01:19 AM
A) Only if it hasn't washed its asterix.

Q) How many archers does it take to screw up a post?

Tim Roberts
December 31st, 2007, 02:35 AM
A) None, it's better to use a screwdriver.

Q) Why is it so?

December 31st, 2007, 04:01 AM
why do birds fly south for the winter?

Tim Roberts
December 31st, 2007, 04:07 AM
A) They can't afford the cab fare.

Q) What was the best thing before sliced bread?

December 31st, 2007, 05:54 AM
Q] before television, did people used to say radio would rot your mind?

December 31st, 2007, 12:23 PM
A) No but, sitting to close would ruin your hearing.

Q) When a Bear gets done in the woods, does it use needles or leaves?

December 31st, 2007, 01:30 PM
A) Charmin, haven't you seen the comercials

Q) If train A leaves the station at 12:15 and is scheduled to arrive 3:45 and train B leaves the station 11:50 and is scheduled to arrive 4:00. At what point do the two trains cross paths?

Tim Roberts
December 31st, 2007, 03:43 PM
A) When Gomez Addams wants them to.

Q) If a tree falls in the forest, do the other trees laugh?

December 31st, 2007, 05:54 PM
A) ... probably

Q) is the Hoover dam fat?

Tim Roberts
December 31st, 2007, 09:09 PM
A) Not on it's water only diet.

Q) Why do people bother making new year resolutions?

December 31st, 2007, 11:33 PM
A) Because they are afraid of changing color

Q) Are you looking forward to the New Year?

December 31st, 2007, 11:43 PM
A) Yes, I love political commercials

Q) Why are whales big?

December 31st, 2007, 11:47 PM
A) All the better for you to see them

Q) Have you been drinking beer?

December 31st, 2007, 11:56 PM
A) No, It might stunt my growth.

Q) Why do people like fluffy dogs?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 12:02 AM
A) They're tasty.

Q) What do beards hide?

January 1st, 2008, 12:16 AM
A) Chuck Norris' chin

Q) what's the deal with disaffected college students?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 12:34 AM
A) Who cares.

Q) Why is there a no man's land?

January 1st, 2008, 12:37 AM
A) 'cause that's where the women are and they don't let us in!

Q) why's the sky blue?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 12:50 AM
A) 'Cos it's so sad.

Q) Is that a mole on your shoulder?

January 1st, 2008, 12:53 AM
A) you didn't put a question mark, so technically, it's not a question that i can answer, now can i? :wink:

Q) doesn't grammar matter anymore?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 01:08 AM
You can now. :lol3:

A) My granma passed away years ago.

Q) Why is a question mark so important?

January 1st, 2008, 01:12 AM
A) it just is (and i couldn't think of an answer for your question lol)

Q) Deal or no deal?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 01:16 AM
A) It's on TV now.

Q) Why is the MASH series longer than the war it depicts?

January 1st, 2008, 01:33 PM
A) Because Alan Alda had a good contract

Q) Was "Cottage Cheese " made in a cottage ?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 02:46 PM
A) Only if it was a cottage industry.

Q) Why does work suck after New Year?

January 1st, 2008, 05:04 PM
A) Work sucks every day.

Q) Why is Feb. the leap month rather than Sept.?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 05:06 PM
A) February had a better lawyer.

Q) Why does the english alphabet have 26 letters?

January 1st, 2008, 06:00 PM
A) Because 26 is a nice round number

Q) If Suzy is 5' and Joe is 5'10, how tall will their kids be?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 06:04 PM
A) Hard to say as both are only 5 years old now.

Q) What would happen if there were more than 12 months in a year?

January 1st, 2008, 06:06 PM
A) The earths population turn sky blue

Q) How many months have 28 days in them?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 06:15 PM
A) All of them do.

Q) Why do all the days in Y?

January 1st, 2008, 06:18 PM
A) Because someone felt that the letter Y wasn't used enough

Q) How many people fit in a bathtub?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 06:21 PM
A) As many as required for the World record.

Q) If the water is deep and cold, should swimming be allowed?

January 1st, 2008, 06:24 PM
Q] why do tree grow roots and leaves?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 06:42 PM
A) To give wombats something to do.

Q) Why are Jeeps so popular?

January 1st, 2008, 06:53 PM
A) it is hard to go four-wheelin' on a bicycle

Q) Why is the village missing their idiot?

January 1st, 2008, 06:56 PM
Q] why is chicago the windy city?

Tim Roberts
January 1st, 2008, 07:06 PM
A) It's inhabitants eat too much cabbage.

Q) Why can't I be bothered working?

January 2nd, 2008, 01:19 AM
A) 'cause you're that good at concentrating

Q) what will happen this year?

Tim Roberts
January 2nd, 2008, 02:09 AM
A) Lots of stuff.

Q) Does TV suck more than normal at this time of the year?

January 3rd, 2008, 01:03 PM
A) Nope, SUCKS all the time!

Q) Is it gonna rain?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 02:29 PM
A) Yes, it will rain somewhere in the World today.

Q) Why does Sally sell sheashells by the seashore?

January 3rd, 2008, 06:19 PM
A) Because they sell well on Ebay

Why does beer "fizz up" when shaken?

January 3rd, 2008, 06:20 PM
(A) Not sure but if you spill some on the floor its alcohol abuse!

(Q) Why do you park in a driveway but drive on a parkway?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 06:30 PM
A) That's the only way to get to where you need to go.

Q) What does Peter Piper do with all the pickled peppers?

January 3rd, 2008, 06:38 PM
A) he trades them to Sally for seashells

Q) Quick Tim, what's your name?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 07:10 PM
A) My name is known only to a select few. :secret:

Q) Why are there 12 days of Christmas?

January 3rd, 2008, 07:18 PM
A) To precede the 13 in a bakers dozen

Q) What is the leading killer of men?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 07:29 PM
A) Women.

Q) Why did Jack and Jill really go up the hill?

January 3rd, 2008, 07:32 PM
A) To see Jimi Hendrix

Q) Why is there 13 in a baker's dozen?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 07:36 PM
A) The original couldn't count.

Q) Where did Elvis go when he left the building?

January 3rd, 2008, 07:39 PM
A) To share a coke with my Ex's grandfather (true story, btw)

Q) If good girls go to heaven, what do bad boys do?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 07:42 PM
A) Go to the hot place with all the bad girls.

Q) Why did Humpty Dumpty climb that wall?

January 3rd, 2008, 07:45 PM
A) To get the missus something from Victoria's secret

Q) Why is Nascar so fascinating?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 07:55 PM
A) People love to swivel their necks round and round.

Q) Why is baseball so fascinating?

January 3rd, 2008, 11:17 PM
A) Because its no fun to watch grown men play T-Ball

Q) Why do sharks have teeth?

Tim Roberts
January 3rd, 2008, 11:25 PM
A) All the better to eat you with.

Q) Why do crocs rock?

January 4th, 2008, 05:25 PM
A) Because they have a little boogie

If the sky is up and the ground is down, what's in the middle?

Tim Roberts
January 4th, 2008, 07:59 PM
A) A nice gooey chocolate fudge centre.

Q) What would happen if Jack Daniels shot wild turkey?

January 4th, 2008, 09:28 PM
A) He'd lose his Apple Pucker

Q) Why do guys on this site like "The Thread"?

Tim Roberts
January 4th, 2008, 11:09 PM
A) They view it for the articles.

Q) What is wrong with the weather?

January 5th, 2008, 01:14 AM
A) The wind is blowing!

Q) Why are peas green?

Tim Roberts
January 5th, 2008, 01:39 AM
A) They're jealous of the beans.

Q) What did the monkey say to the banana?

January 7th, 2008, 04:47 PM
A) You look like a baby, now get in my belly!

Q) How come people drive slower when you're in a hurry?

Tim Roberts
January 7th, 2008, 06:40 PM
A) It's an international conspiracy to upset the weather.

Q) Why are bananas bent?

January 8th, 2008, 07:33 AM
A] they keep all the strait ones for themselves

Q] what do kangaroos carry in their pouches?

January 8th, 2008, 02:13 PM
Extra ammunition and frags.

Why is the Ocean so blue?

Tim Roberts
January 8th, 2008, 08:29 PM
A) It's upset about what the fish do.

Q) What does a Koala do all day?

January 8th, 2008, 11:29 PM
Prays for death, so it can be reincarnated as something respectable........ Like a Lamprey.

What can we do to get Britney Spears back on Track with her career and family?

Tim Roberts
January 8th, 2008, 11:59 PM
A) Hope that she believes in re-incarnation.

Q) Is Global warming really upon us?

January 9th, 2008, 12:24 AM
Absolutely. My calculations indicate that all the ice in Pennsylvania will melt by late March, or early April of 2008, at the latest, followed by a profuse and rapid growth of all vegetation shortly thereafter. I expect temperatures to rise as much as 60 degrees Fahrenheit in only six months!

What more proof do you need?

Tim Roberts
January 9th, 2008, 12:32 AM
A) A higher proof alcohol would be nice.

Q) Is the speed of light faster or slower than the speed of sound?

January 9th, 2008, 12:58 AM
The answer is directly related to the potency of the LSD involved.

Merciful Euthanasia, or Oblivious Senility

January 9th, 2008, 07:10 PM
A) both, I'm an over acheiver :doh:

Q) Where do socks go when they get lost in the wash?

Tim Roberts
January 9th, 2008, 07:34 PM
A) They all go to a sock hop party.

Q) What was the best thing before sliced bread?

January 9th, 2008, 07:41 PM
A) Circling the wgaons

Q) If men are from Mars and women are from Venus, where is a dog from?

Tim Roberts
January 9th, 2008, 08:01 PM
A) Uranus.

Q) Why is chicken soup good for the soul?

January 10th, 2008, 12:17 AM
Because it reminds me I am soooooo superior to chickens

How ugly was she?

Tim Roberts
January 10th, 2008, 12:52 AM
A) She was so ugly that I can't begin to describe her.

Q) Why didn't Coyote catch the Road Runner?

January 10th, 2008, 01:00 AM
The Coyote lacked a Nitrous Injection system.

"She was so ugly, She made Blind Kids Cry."

What did the Blonde say when she found out she was Pregnant?

Tim Roberts
January 10th, 2008, 01:09 AM
A) Is it mine?

Q) How do you make an onion cry?

January 10th, 2008, 09:23 AM
why do birds sing?

Tim Roberts
January 10th, 2008, 02:16 PM
A) To get the big pay cheques.

Q) Why do worms live underground?

January 19th, 2008, 11:26 AM
A) They took the terroist threats to heart

Q) If two people have come back, who's the front?

Tim Roberts
January 20th, 2008, 02:39 PM
A) The front is where the weather lives.

Q) What is the meaning of life?

January 24th, 2008, 12:44 AM
q] do two wrongs make a right?

Tim Roberts
January 24th, 2008, 01:40 AM
A) If no one is watching.

Q) Where does the light go?

January 28th, 2008, 12:10 PM
(a) where all other light goes.
(q) and where does light go ,after it has gone to where all other light has gone?.

Tim Roberts
January 28th, 2008, 02:43 PM
A) The dark side of the moon.

Q) Who lives on the dark side of the moon?

February 5th, 2008, 09:07 AM
A} rodger waters

Q}what does Prince name his dog?

Tim Roberts
February 5th, 2008, 02:21 PM
A) He calls it dog to avoid confusion.

Q) What was the best Super Bowl ad?

February 7th, 2008, 09:25 AM
a} the one that came on when i had to pee

q}who keeps track of records here?

Tim Roberts
February 7th, 2008, 02:34 PM
A) That would be Recordkeeper. :lol:

Q) Has AT set any records.

February 9th, 2008, 11:47 PM
A} the record for wasting time at work, maybe

Q}what is really at the end of a rainbow?

Tim Roberts
February 10th, 2008, 01:05 AM
A) There are several naked nymphs awaiting you.

Q) What would you do with a pot of gold?

February 14th, 2008, 11:57 AM
A) Empty out the gold so I could boil water.

Q) Why is Mexican food so good?

February 14th, 2008, 12:01 PM
q) how come Bo and Luke never got into too much trouble on The Dukes of Hazzard?

February 14th, 2008, 12:37 PM
A) Because of Daisy Duke.

Q) Is Valentines Day not the stupidest holliday?

Tim Roberts
February 14th, 2008, 02:30 PM
A) Yes unless you own shares in Hallmark.

Q) Is the weekend a good time to travel?

February 14th, 2008, 03:42 PM
what is a acronymn or whatever for D.O.D.G.E (one for Ford is Found on road dead:set1_punch:)?

Tim Roberts
February 14th, 2008, 03:56 PM
A) Drive Over Deadly Gopher Environments.

Q) Why is the World so big?

February 14th, 2008, 04:29 PM
A) It's is small, we just don't know it......yet! :wink:

Q) Can you cry under the water?

Tim Roberts
February 14th, 2008, 08:10 PM
A) If you cry under water it would hurt your eyes.

Q) What flavour is river water?

February 16th, 2008, 08:57 AM
A The Same As All Other River Water

Q. Why Do We All Live Down Stream?

February 16th, 2008, 09:39 AM
a}because its the best place to spawn

q}is recreation the secret to life?

February 16th, 2008, 09:44 AM
a}because its the best place to spawn

q}why does the work week take so long to pass?

February 16th, 2008, 02:50 PM
A) to keep us from becoming weak

Q) do Cajuns blacken the other white meat?

February 16th, 2008, 03:16 PM
A) no they brown it

Q) why do i waste so much time at work on this site?

February 16th, 2008, 04:14 PM
A) to keep yourself mentally alert

Q) do they always put the brown side down?

Tim Roberts
February 17th, 2008, 07:42 PM
A) That only happens in special circumstances.

Q) If pork is white, why is bacon pink?

February 18th, 2008, 04:42 PM
a. that the femal part of the bacon
q. why dont pigs whistle?.

Tim Roberts
February 18th, 2008, 09:38 PM
A) They don't need to attract any one's attention.

Q) How long can you wear one pair of underpants for?

February 19th, 2008, 05:55 AM
A) For the entire round of golf.

Q) What is the difference between a porch and a patio?

February 19th, 2008, 06:39 AM
a. a porch is always covered as where a patio doesn have to be!.

q. what is the difference between steps and a stoop?

February 19th, 2008, 06:55 AM
(a) stairs we climb, stoop we climb unless your a bird of prey then you dive towards your prey

(q) why are there so many taxes for us to pay?

February 19th, 2008, 08:27 AM
a} because polititions want boats, too

q} why do cats always land on their feet?

February 19th, 2008, 12:44 PM
A) Because they don't know Physics

Q) what would a grandmother clock look like?

Tim Roberts
February 19th, 2008, 02:17 PM
A) It would be warm and cuddly.

Q) Why is Blues music blue?

February 19th, 2008, 03:36 PM
(a) better called blue than mauve

(q) why is it snowing and the sun is shining?

February 21st, 2008, 05:38 AM
A) It is winter?

Q) Why does food have to taste so good?

February 21st, 2008, 11:14 AM
a. if it didnt tase good you would not eat it.

q. if you never ate food ,how would you know what its saposed to taste like?

Tim Roberts
February 21st, 2008, 02:33 PM
A) The internet would tell you, as it has all the answers.

Q) What was the best thing before sliced bread?

February 22nd, 2008, 06:36 AM
A) bread

Q) Do you shovel or scoop?

Tim Roberts
February 22nd, 2008, 11:12 PM
A) It doesn't matter as long as the food gets in my mouth.

Q) Does a bear poop in the woods?

February 23rd, 2008, 11:20 AM
a. yes

q. but where?

Tim Roberts
February 23rd, 2008, 02:52 PM
A) Anywhere it wants to.

Q) How does a radio work?

February 23rd, 2008, 04:40 PM
A) you turn it on

Q) why can't campo kill an elk?

Tim Roberts
February 23rd, 2008, 10:41 PM
A) He's looking where they aren't.

Q) If an elk trips in the woods, do the squirrels laugh?

February 24th, 2008, 12:14 AM
A) no they pee on the ground

Q) How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?

Tim Roberts
February 24th, 2008, 01:56 AM
A) 69.

Q) Why did they invent chewing gum?

February 24th, 2008, 05:05 AM
A) so that they could repair the dikes in Holland.

Q) If a rock rolls slowly can it gather moss?

February 24th, 2008, 10:45 AM
a. not unless it has a sticky substance on it.

q. how tight is a tight rope?

February 24th, 2008, 12:43 PM
a) depends on the tight wad that bought it.

Q) Do dimples make a golf ball cute?

February 24th, 2008, 04:00 PM
a.only if your putter thinks so!!

q. if i have a penny today, and doubled it, every day for 30 days ,how much money would i have at the end of 30 days?

Tim Roberts
February 24th, 2008, 05:34 PM
A) None. You'd buy beer.

Q) Why can you only fold a piece of paper seven times?

Hoyt Thompson
February 24th, 2008, 05:43 PM
A) cause after paper folds 7 times he gets mad and leaves the table.

Q) why is poker considered a sport?

Tim Roberts
February 24th, 2008, 06:10 PM
A) People need to justify their reason for playing indoors.

Q) Why don't trades people turn up on time?

February 25th, 2008, 10:06 AM
a. because they are always in a down time mode.

q. what was the spice in the saying ( variety is the spice of life)?. wow good thinkin on my part huh/.

Tim Roberts
February 25th, 2008, 02:19 PM
A) It was a special blend of ginseng, garlic and ginger, which was rubbed into your private parts.

Q) Why is he who hesitates lost?

February 25th, 2008, 04:51 PM
a. one is not lost if he doesnt hesitate!.

q.why do cats only have nine (9) lives?.

Tim Roberts
February 25th, 2008, 07:01 PM
A) 'Cos they're so stupid.

Q) Why does dropped toast fall butter side down?

February 25th, 2008, 07:25 PM
a. because if it fell butter side -up, you would not throw it away ,answer#2, the weight of the butter on one side made it un-ballanced, and it fliped over.

q.why was tomorrow ,named the day before yesterday?.

February 25th, 2008, 08:13 PM
A) because the french named it

Q) Why do we spend more time on this site at work than actually doing work?

Tim Roberts
February 25th, 2008, 09:39 PM
A) The boss isn't watching. :secret:

Q) Why are these games addictive?

Hoyt Thompson
February 25th, 2008, 10:12 PM
A) Because we are junkies looking for the gamers high.

Q) what ever happened to Mario?

Tim Roberts
February 26th, 2008, 01:09 AM
A) Did he go super and leave the planet.

Q) Why did MASH go for longer than the war?

February 26th, 2008, 01:19 AM
A) because the show sponsors were still making money off it unlike the real war.

Q) How much do Australian beer truck drivers make?

Tim Roberts
February 26th, 2008, 02:25 AM
A) About a six pack an hour.

Q) Do people over the pond drink Fosters beer?

February 26th, 2008, 05:48 AM
a}only by the pallet

q} how did leap year get it's name

mario is making porn now360395

February 26th, 2008, 12:14 PM
A) by a leap of faith

Q) If a bell tolls what sound does a ring make?

February 26th, 2008, 12:37 PM
(a) if its like the one in my head it hurts

(q) why is it so hard to make a arrow restriction rule?

February 26th, 2008, 12:41 PM
Because arrow feathers tickle.

How can clowns fit so many in a car?

February 26th, 2008, 02:23 PM
A) they lay the arrows parallel to each other.

Q) Do the clowns care if the fletchings match their outfits?

Tim Roberts
February 26th, 2008, 02:28 PM
A) Only if it clashes with their lipstick.

Q) Why aren't there more female clowns?

February 26th, 2008, 03:49 PM
a. the clown union forbids woman to be clowns , just men can enter the rodeo bull riding arena!! (sounds good to me!)

q.why is it 8 seconds and not 9 or 7 seconds to stay on.

Tim Roberts
February 26th, 2008, 03:57 PM
A) 8 seconds is the limit of the attention span of the judges.

Q) Why does the remote control disappear?

February 26th, 2008, 08:00 PM
a it only is missing when the porn movies come on (i think wifes have a tv guide).

q. do angles only eat cake?.

Tim Roberts
February 26th, 2008, 09:21 PM
A) No angle would eat a cake.

Q) If the early bird catches the worm, what does the late bird get?

February 27th, 2008, 06:25 AM
(a) cooked

(q) is there really a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow?

February 27th, 2008, 10:12 AM
a. only if you belive such tales

q. is there a pot of gold at each end of a rainbow?

Tim Roberts
February 27th, 2008, 02:24 PM
A) Yep, it was put there years ago by the Unicorns.

Q) Why does haste make waste?

February 27th, 2008, 07:44 PM
a. ah ha !! because waste, is what you get when you put the letter (h ) in place of the letter p and the end result is paste , which we all know is waste. and thats why understand?.

q.what is a tiddele wink?

Tim Roberts
February 27th, 2008, 08:56 PM
A) It's what happens when you're drunk.

Q) Is there life after death?

February 27th, 2008, 10:11 PM
A.you Can Only Find Out After You Die

Q. Who Will You Tell After You Find Out?

February 27th, 2008, 11:43 PM
A} The archery God:D
Q} What time is it?

Tim Roberts
February 28th, 2008, 12:59 AM
A) Now.

Q) What is there to eat?

February 28th, 2008, 07:35 AM
A woodchuck would chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could if a woodchuck could chuck wood! (Thanks to my Pappaw for that one!)

February 28th, 2008, 09:09 AM
(a) anything in my fridge.

(q) why does it cost a dime to make a nickel?

February 28th, 2008, 10:28 AM
a. inflation costs have risen.

q.the famous quote by shakespear (to be or not to be) , what would you be if you chose not ,to be?.

Tim Roberts
February 28th, 2008, 02:28 PM
A) If it is to be , it is up to me.

Q) Why should we beware the ides of March?

February 28th, 2008, 03:05 PM
Because On That Day The 13th The Roman Legion On Its Way To Rome On The Apian Way ,for All The Christians To See While Hanging On The Crosses Strung Out Along The The Way One Christian Was Muttering Something As The General Was Passing By,he Stoped To Ask Him What He Said , He Kept Insisting That He Be Told ,and The Christion Replied (we Love A Parade)..

February 28th, 2008, 03:08 PM
Q.how Does One Chop With Chop Sticks?.

Tim Roberts
February 28th, 2008, 03:16 PM
A) Carefully.

Q) Why does an Army march on it's stomach?

February 29th, 2008, 02:55 PM
(a) I don't know

(q) whats for dinner?

Tim Roberts
February 29th, 2008, 03:11 PM
A) Too far away to think about.

Q) Why do two odds make an even?

February 29th, 2008, 11:03 PM
a. say if you have one odd ,and i have one odd ,we are even!

q.why dont pigs whistle?

Tim Roberts
March 1st, 2008, 12:37 AM
A) They're not attracted by the other pigs.

Q) Why should we wet the whistle?

March 1st, 2008, 01:10 PM
a. when you wet the whistle in soapy water you get bubbles,thats why!.

q. is tinkerbells godmother ,the fairy godmother , in the cinderalla story?.

March 1st, 2008, 01:21 PM
(a) i thought her godmither was in shrek

(q) should i ditch the BHFS and just shoot FS?

March 2nd, 2008, 06:38 AM
A) I though Fat Shafts were out.

Q) How many games can you play and keep up?

March 2nd, 2008, 01:06 PM
(a) just one

(q) who is gonna win the race at las vegas?

Tim Roberts
March 2nd, 2008, 02:11 PM
A) The first one.

Q) Why were computers invented?

March 2nd, 2008, 03:57 PM
a} to interupt boredome

q}who gets cabin-fever the worst

Tim Roberts
March 2nd, 2008, 06:36 PM
A) The mice in the walls.

Q) Why do mice eat cheese?

March 2nd, 2008, 06:54 PM
A) 'cause mayo didn't cut it for them

Q) why are oceans blue?

March 2nd, 2008, 08:22 PM
a. so they would match the sea.

q. that saying (and on the other hand) !! what is on the other hand?.

Tim Roberts
March 2nd, 2008, 09:33 PM
A) The other thing.

Q) Is the truth really out there?

March 3rd, 2008, 10:18 AM
(a) somewhere

(q) who sent the first email?

March 3rd, 2008, 12:11 PM
a. al gore did ,just after he invented the internet!.

q. shape up or ship out!!. to where?

Tim Roberts
March 3rd, 2008, 02:33 PM
A) You should always go there.

Q) Who invented toilet paper?

March 3rd, 2008, 03:27 PM
A) Mr. Whipple?

Q) Why do doors screak?

Tim Roberts
March 3rd, 2008, 03:34 PM
A) To let the wife know you're home.

Q) Why can't you be quiet when you're drunk?

March 4th, 2008, 07:02 AM
(A) cause I'm laughing to hard

(Q) How much does it take to get you drunk?

Tim Roberts
March 4th, 2008, 03:01 PM
A) Not much. :lol:

Q) How do you know when you've had enough to drink?

March 5th, 2008, 10:37 AM
a. when it startsr unning out of your nose.

q.sex appeal ( why would you appeal)?.

March 5th, 2008, 02:37 PM
A. i wouldn't

Q. Whats the weather like year round down under Tim?

Tim Roberts
March 5th, 2008, 02:41 PM
A) Hot, cold, dry and wet.

Q) Why is it hot in the Summer?

March 6th, 2008, 10:32 AM
A. the sun is closer to us

Q. why can it rain when its below 32 degress?

Tim Roberts
March 6th, 2008, 09:35 PM
A) That's not rain falling.

Q) Why is more power a good thing?

March 7th, 2008, 10:41 AM
a. because who ever has the most power when they die! ,wins!

b. where does all the excess power go?

March 7th, 2008, 02:37 PM
a] I'm saving all the extra power

q] where is the worst place for frostbite?

March 7th, 2008, 06:55 PM
a. in the middle of antartica,in the nude!

q. does jack frost bite?

March 7th, 2008, 08:01 PM
A- more like a nibble

Q- do dentures get cavities?

March 7th, 2008, 08:22 PM
A- No

Q- What color does a smurf turn when u choke it?

March 7th, 2008, 11:04 PM
A: Purple

Q: Gas grill or charcoal?

Tim Roberts
March 7th, 2008, 11:34 PM
A) As long as the food's cooked, who cares?

Q) Why are CDs round?

March 8th, 2008, 12:34 AM
A: They aren't they are flat.

Q: Is global warming real?

Tim Roberts
March 8th, 2008, 01:33 AM
A) All light globes get warm.

Q) Why were light globes invented.

March 8th, 2008, 01:41 AM
a) marketing research found that dark globes would not sell

Q) is it shorter to the moon or by bus?

Tim Roberts
March 8th, 2008, 01:44 AM
A) I can see the moon, but can't see the bus. So the moon is closer.

Q) If the answer is 42, what is the question?

March 8th, 2008, 01:48 AM
a) what is my waist size

Q) what is the difference between an orange?

March 8th, 2008, 11:52 AM
A: and what

Q: Why do I spend so much time in mutantville?

March 8th, 2008, 11:59 AM
a. tring to find out what!!

q. what is the difference between what and an orange?.

Tim Roberts
March 8th, 2008, 11:09 PM
A) You can't eat a watt.

Q) Where does the moon hide in the day time?

March 8th, 2008, 11:55 PM
A: In your pants unless your a plumber!!!

Q:Why are plumbers moons so prevalent?

Tim Roberts
March 9th, 2008, 01:41 AM
A) It's their way of getting the tide to move.

Q) Why do building workers whistle at the good looking women?

March 9th, 2008, 10:20 AM
A) they are like tea pots building up pressure

B) why do dogs drag their butts on the carpet? (ours just did)

March 9th, 2008, 03:20 PM
A: Their roids itch!

B: What is the meaning of life?

March 9th, 2008, 07:45 PM
a] your born, you live ,you die.

q] is re-incarnation real?

March 9th, 2008, 08:42 PM
A: Nope

Q:Is there heaven and hell?

Tim Roberts
March 10th, 2008, 12:04 AM
A) Yep, album by Black Sabbath.

Q) Why is Judge Judy on TV?

March 10th, 2008, 06:31 AM
A:I think soccer moms like her.

Q:Why so many court room shows on TV?

March 10th, 2008, 07:42 AM
A. aint got a clue.

Q. why is this thing beside my computer called a mouse pad?

Tim Roberts
March 10th, 2008, 03:42 PM
A) Because at night the mice make out on it.

Q) Why is it called a keyboard and not a letter board?

March 10th, 2008, 04:02 PM
a. because !! there is no place the put a postage stamp on it ,if you were to mail it

q.if we all live down stream,who lives up stream?

Tim Roberts
March 10th, 2008, 04:18 PM
A) The others.

Q) Why does the English alphabet have 26 letters?

March 10th, 2008, 04:56 PM
a.because that guy, ( morris code) ran out of dit ,dot , dash ,dits!

q.why do they count backwards from 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1?

Tim Roberts
March 10th, 2008, 10:53 PM
A) 'Cos they can.

Q) What is black and white and read all over?

March 11th, 2008, 12:46 AM
A: newspaper

Q: When are the bass gonna spawn?

Tim Roberts
March 11th, 2008, 02:10 AM
A) When they're in the mood.

Q) What gets the bass in the mood?

March 11th, 2008, 06:44 AM
A. money

Q> why are people rude?

March 11th, 2008, 08:52 AM
a. bacause they are ignorant

q. why is ignorance bliss?

March 11th, 2008, 12:49 PM
a. its only beautiful to those that belive that someone is not stupid!

q. what makes a person stupid?

Tim Roberts
March 11th, 2008, 03:15 PM
A) Drugs.

Q) Who are they and why will they do it?

March 11th, 2008, 11:36 PM
A: I don't have a clue.

Q: Who is the smartest mutantville resident?

Tim Roberts
March 12th, 2008, 02:10 AM
A) The one who stays away.

Q) What is the best rum to drink?

March 12th, 2008, 06:59 AM
A to any for me to choose

Q. whats the best brand of beer?

Tim Roberts
March 12th, 2008, 03:19 PM
A) :pukey: none.

Q) Why does beer taste so bad?

March 12th, 2008, 05:55 PM
A: Because it's not made with Jack Daniels.

Q: Why does Mexican beer taste even worse?