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I'm wondering what you would do in this situation. My son has been battling a severe eye infection since April that has him in need of a cornea transplant to restore his vision in his right eye. The transplant however cannot be done for months as his eye needs to recover from the initial damage the infection caused. We travel almost weekly (15 trips so far) to an Opthamologist at the Mayo Clinic that is 4 hours away, one-way. My son has had three surgeries since being diagnosed with the infection, basically to debris the eye and get biopsies for the lab. All of the surgeries have been suprises, meaning none of them were scheduled...just kind of happen. His last surgery was three weeks ago and he's been progressing nicely with the doctor saying everything has looked good for the last two weeks. He says his eye feels better than it ever has. He has another checkup this Saturday.

I am scheduled to leave on an antelope hunt tomorrow through Sunday. Both he and his mother say go hunting and that they will be fine going to the check up. Am I a complete [email protected]#! for even thinking about going on this hunt and letting my wife and son go to his appointment without me? Let me have it if I deserve it.
 

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Smilin' Bob
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To me, its not like an antelope hunt is a once-in-a-lifetime hunt. I'd stay home, get my kids better, and take them on the next antelope hunt.

At the same time, if they're fine with you going, I can't see any reason to say you'd be wrong for going either. Only saying what I'd do.:)
 

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I, for one, would likely head out hunting. It doesn't mean you don't love your family. For me, it boils down to common sense. If things are looking OK, shouldn't be a problem. Things are going to work out one way or another, regardless of whether you are there or not. If you have their blessing, go Huntin'.. Then again, if your wife is saying to go ahead and go to create a guilt trip, you may want to rethink this (I have a little experience with this type of behavior). My $.02
 

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i dont know....it depends on the severity of the condition....if it were just a check up and both of them didnt care then i would probaly go....on the other,if my son was in a bad condition and was going to have to have surgery then Lord no i wouldnt go....you just have to ask yourself if you care.....if your already feeling guilty then you might as well stay home, cause your not going to have a good time,youll spend your time worrying and beating yourself down....i mean thats not a bad thing sounds to me your are a good family man,and your son is very important to you.

btw let us know how things go with him,hope everything goes smoothly!

maxx
 

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I don't think that you are being an A** by going. If they are are both ok with it then I would go. It will be a good chance to clear your head and relax. When you get back, give you wife the same opportunity to do something for herself.
 

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If they really sincerely want you to go then I think you should.

Maybe your son does not want to be the reason that you miss your trip?

Good luck to your son in his recovery.
 

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Hook Em said:
It sounds like they don't mind if you go..but the real question is: Will YOU mind if you go? Are you going to have fun on your trip, or will you feel guilty the whole time and not enjoy your hunt?

Good luck with your decision!
Well said Hook Em - I think this is the key.

It sounds like you should be fine to go, but I don't have any kids yet, so I can't say that I completely understand your situation.
 

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No one on here can tell you what to do. You have to look inside, If you don't have any guilty feelings about going on the trip then do it. If you do then it would be best for your mental health to stay home and reschedule. How would you feel or what would you do if a suprise surgery came from the next meeting. (god willing it won't). That is a very hard personal decision, what ever you decide I wish you and your family the best!
 

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That would purely be a personal decision. If your family gave you the go ahead...I'd go. Plus there really isn't anything you could be doing at home to speed up the recovery of your son. Tough situation.
 

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Get your priorities straight! Your son should come before a pronghorn. Your wife and son could make it just fine without you BUT there is always the "what if" factor. I'd stay with my son and we would go after pronghorn together next year.:darkbeer:

3L
 

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3L_Archer said:
Get your priorities straight! Your son should come before a pronghorn. Your wife and son could make it just fine without you BUT there is always the "what if" factor. I'd stay with my son and we would go after pronghorn together next year.:darkbeer:

3L
amen, I love to hunt as much as the next guy but if there is a pattern of emergency surgery then I'd not chance it. I have three children and they are far more precious to me than a hunt. I'd try and reschedule the hunt . . . I'm going to assume its not the only hunt you'll do this year just the only antelope hunt you'll do.

You and your family will be in my prayers.
 

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Ok

It sounds to me like you have always did the right thing and was always there for your family. Now, the want you to go, so go. If it was a life and death situation then stay home. Also do not feel guilty, they want you to do hunting and they know you love your son. I missed my best friends wedding because my son had a super bad shaph infection and was not getting better and it was touch and go with losing his arm or his life. Now the is a life or death situation. Yours is not. Go and do not feel guilty or beat yourself up.
Steady:darkbeer: :)
 

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P&Y.......I wouldn't even begin to suggest what you should do....very personal decision there. I just wanted to wish your son luck.
 

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The days in advance I would struggle with this decision and situation as well...
In the end, I personally would go with my wife and son to the appointment and cancel the hunt. Within 30 seconds of being on the road with the family I would know in my heart that I made the right decision and never look back. Anyways, I wouldn't want to go on a hunt with something like that waying heavily on my shoulders. This is only my opinion and there is no right or wrong answer here... this is a very personal decision.
If you do decide to go on your hunt good luck!!!
Also, I hope for a complete and speedy recovery for your son!
 

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If the procedures have become fairly routine and are not life threatening I would say go.

On the other hand if you were in the process of anxiously awaiting the actual transplant then i would most likely stay.

But if your wife feels that she can handle the drive to and from Mayo and take care of your son during any recovery processs then it shouldnt be a big problem.

Be prepared to reciprocate the gesture to your wife at some point by taking full responsibility for getting your son to the Dr. and back a time or two in the future to give her a break.
 

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Son

I think it depends on the relationship you have with your wife and son. Only you know if they truly want you to go on the hunt. If they truly want you to go, then I would go(only you know that). Any one who passes judgement on your decision is not truly your friend. I pray that your son heals fully, Tom.
 

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I would think of it this way.....IF something happened (emergency surgery, son wakes up in the morning and is blind in that eye, etc.) would you be able to live with yourself ? Could you live the rest of your days wondering if your son was wishing you were there to comfort him? I couldn't....stay home
 

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You asked

so...if you shot a trophy would you be able to look at it as anything more than the one you shot while your son was laying in the hospital. You will not know the true impact of leaving your wife and son until your son is old enough to have children and he sits down to tell you what it really meant to him. If it was his 6th grade graduation, go hunting. If it was a wart removal, go hunting. I don't care what you say, they will be scared and you should be there with them. I drove myself to a surgery while my ex-wife went to a convention. As an adult I could not believe her decision to go recreate while I was in surgery. Just imagine what a child will think about you not being there and conversely what he will think about you sacrificing for him. Believe me this could be a life altering event if you blow it. Stay with your son and wife. They will never forget it and you can look back on it with pride for years.
 
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